Can it really be?

It’s now 8:22 pm and I have had…count with me now…1 (one) soma today. No lortab. Yeah me! It’s going on 24 hours since I’ve taken one and damn it…that makes me happy. However, in saying this…I’m taking one just as soon as this posts. After doing all of the cleaning and laundry today, it’s starting to catch up with me and I’m feeling it. But just knowing I can get through again without taking that shit is a Hip Hip Hooray moment for me!

And for an update on the ugly from yesterday…Yes, again…too much information!

Make. It. Stop.

Seriously…this shit needs to stop. And now.

I was perfectly fine before I had that run in with Cymbalta. The cocktail I was on was doing its job. Granted, I still had some bad days, but not like this. This is ridiculous.

Part of the issue I believe is with the Lortab. See…Lortab causes constipation which causes hard stools which causes straining which leads to both muscles spasms and the all dreaded hemorrhoids.

If you are brave, feel free to read more below…, but it ain’t pretty. You’ve been warned.

No stupidity lately, well…

Nothing odd or weird or panic attack provoking has happened since my last post. Woohoo!! I saw Garcia last week and she said just keep with my normal cocktail and all should be well. The only thing I have to do is get my Vitamin D checked after the first of the year.

My eyes have been hurting me more lately and it’s driving me crazy. I know it’s my own fault because I’m straining them playing Space Wars, Mob Wars and Vampire Wars on Face Book. If anyone who actually reads this is on Face Book, feel free to add me as a friend for any of the above Wars, just put which one in the little note section.

Rather off topic from what I usually talk about…

It snowed. Here. In Vegas. WTF?? Want to see?

We didn’t get much on my side of town, but Henderson and Boulder City got nailed. It was ugly. I hate snow.

driving home

looking out of office window

Normalcy is such a fleeting thing

Yes, I stole that title from my facebook status…so shoot me.

Friday night showed me a glimmer of what my normalcy should be. However, Saturday dawned and normalcy decided to take a hike.

I am back to my normal cocktail of drugs but, as I have found out (the hard way I might add) they do not take you back to the way you were immediately. Stupid freaking doctors! Anyway…Saturday saw a panic attack early because I forgot how bad the muscle spasms in my chest were (hey isn’t that what the drugs are for??) So therefore Kel thinks she’s having a damn heart attack even though she knows good and well that her heart is just peachy and she’s freaking for nothing. And you know what happens when you have a panic attack right? Yup…you guessed it. You tense up and you hurt even worse. So guess where I spent most of Saturday? Ye ole couch. Even though I hate her, she was my best friend.

The only thing good that came from Saturday was this:

snowman

Greg stole it for me during Dirty Santa at our local SCCA Christmas party. See…he really does love me.

Today has been better, though not perfect. I will be going back to work tomorrow though it’s not going to be fun since they took me away from my fav attorney. hummppph.

The day after

Today was better. The haze is gone, but my God was the pain there.

I knew when I made the decision to not take any meds last night that today would be bad. But I really didn’t think it would be that bad.

I got up this morning around 9. The migraine still hadn’t dissipated and every muscle felt like it was rebelling against me. I dealt with it until around 1 when I finally took a Soma. Like I told Danielle, I would rather have the high from the Soma (simply because I hadn’t really eaten anything for close to 36 hours) than go through what I went through yesterday. I never want to go through that again.

The Soma kicked in and did its job, for the most part. The Lortab finished it off. It’s now almost 11pm. I actually feel normal. Well, normal for me anyway. My sleep cycle is screwed up, but I’ll deal with that this weekend.

So umm…Cymbalta, you can kiss my ass. I’ll not be taking you again.

Yeah, I don’t recommend it

Yesterday was a living nightmare.

I did what my RA told me. I took my Ambien, Soma and that shit Cymbalta Wednesday night before bed. I do not recommend ever doing that. I was soooo…hell, drugged up, it wasn’t funny. I don’t even remember driving to work Thursday morning. I finally came home around noon because I just could not function. Everything was in slow motion. My skin was crawling. I felt numb. It was ugly.

When I got home I called Danielle before I could go into full panic mode. She told me my RA was stupid, which I fully agree with. I was telling her all of the symptoms and her diagnosis was that I was basically od’ing (without actually od’ing) with all of the meds in my system. I also called my RA’s office and told them what was going on. Their response…go to the ER and have my system flushed out. Before doing that however, I called Alicia, whom I just love from my GP’s office, and she was of a different opinion. She said that they wouldn’t flush my system for 30mg’s of Cymbalta. That I just needed to ride out the storm. I wasn’t really keen on that idea, but it beat the hell out of the ER option.

I consciously made the decision that I would not take any other meds until this shit was out of my system. In making this decision, I knew I would be in pain the today. It was a chance I was willing to take. By 3pm yesterday I had THE migraine from hell. I was already hurting before this, but I could handle it. But when the migraine started, all of the other pain intensified 100 fold. I wanted to just curl up and die. I couldn’t sleep either. Every time I tried my heart would speed up or slow way down. I was either too hot or too cold. It seemed like none of my systems were working right.

I finally laid down around 10:30 to try and get some sleep. I woke up a dozen times or so because I couldn’t get comfortable or the pain just got to be too much. I did get 3 hours solid sleep from about 6-9 am. Needless to say, I did not go into work today. There was no way in hell that was going to happen.

More results, more things wrong

Got a call from the RA’s office a week ago. The blood test results came back. Everything came back normal except one. I am Vitamin D deficient. Apparently extremely so. Normal levels are 30-90. Mine are at 6. I’m now on 50k units of Vitamin D once a week until further notice.

I went in to see the RA today for a follow up again. She asked how things were going with the meds I was on, etc. She wanted to try me on a drug called Cymbalta for the Fibro. I’ve heard of it, but didn’t know much about it. It’s an SSRI or some such thing. Anti-depressant. Umm…hello. No depression here. Why would you put me on an anti-depressant when I don’t have depression. Whatever. I’ll give it a go. I did make sure to ask her about all of the other meds I was taking and whether they should be taken with the Cymbalta. Her response was, oh yeah, you’ll be fine…let’s get a good start on this. Ok, fine.

So we’ll try it and see what happens.

The verdict is in…and about damn time

Back in October I was told to follow up with the rhuematologist to check to see if maybe I had Rheumatoid Arthritis, Lupus or some other like disease. Again, more blood was taken. (Why can’t they just use all the blood the hospital collected huh?) I’m to follow up again in 2 weeks for the results.

I also followed up with my gp because the pain still wasn’t getting any better, neither were the panic/anxiety attacks. They finally got me to agree to take a muscle relaxer (Soma) after she felt the tension in my shoulders. She was actually afraid to give me trigger point injections because I would flinch and she was barely touching me. Sooo…she gave me the Soma and told me to take that with the Lortab for the pain. Good times. Good times. Especially for someone who hates taking narcotics. Oh, and did I forget to mention that they also prescribed Zanax? Oh yeah, for the panic/anxiety attacks. Again…good times.

Back to the RA. All those tests came back negative. Surprise surprise. She finally asks me some pertinent questions, like does this hurt? And how about this? And this? She was going over all of the trigger points of Fibro. She looks at me and said, well, you’ve got Fibro. Really? Nooo. (rolls eyes) She then starts going over all of the symptoms and prescribes Ambien. I’m to take the Ambien, Soma and Lortab at bedtime. Apparently this is supposed to help me sleep. We’ll see.

Oh, and we’re taking more blood tests. Yeah me.